Favorite Ren Fair Songs

Renaissance Faire Song List

All For Me Grog

All for me grog me jolly jolly grog
All for me beer and tobacco
Well I spent all my tin in a shanty drinking gin
Now across the Western Plain I must wander.

I’m stiff stoney broke and I’ve parted with me moke
And the sky is looking black as flaming thunder
And the shanty boss is too for I haven’t got a sou
That’s the way your’re treated when your’re down and under.

Well I’m crook in the head for I haven’t been to bed
Since first I touched this shanty with my plunder
I see centipedes and snakes, and I’m full of pains and aches
So I’d better make a push out over yonder.

I’ll take that Old Man Plain and I’ll cross it once again
Until me eyes the track no longer see boys
And my beer and whisky brain looks for sleep but all in vain
And I feel as if I had the Darling Pea boys.

So hang that blasted grog, that hocussed shanty grog
And the beer that’s loaded with tobacco
Grafting humour I am in and I’ll stick the peg right in
And I’ll settle down once more for some hard yakka.

Beer, Beer, Beer

Beer, beer, beer,
Tiddley beer, beer, beer

A long time ago, way back in history
When all there was to drink was nothing but cups of tea
Along came a man by the name of Charlie Mops
And he invented a wonderful drink and he made it out of hops.

He must have been an admiral, a sultan or a King
And to his praise we shall always sing
Look what he has done for us, he’s filled us up with cheer
Lord bless Charlie Mops the man who invented beer.

Beer, beer, beer,
Tiddley beer, beer, beer.

The Furey’s bar, the Clancy’s pub, the hole in the wall as well
Of one thing you can be sure of, it’s Charlie’s beer they sell
So come on all me lucky lads, at eleven o’clock ye stop
For five short seconds, remember Charlie Mops
One, two, three, four, five.

He must have been an admiral, a sultan or a King
And to his praise we shall always sing
Look what he has done for us, he’s filled us up with cheer
Lord bless Charlie Mops the man who invented beer.

A barrel of malt a bushel of hops,
You stir it around with a stick
The type of lubrication to make your engine tick
Forty pints of wallop a day will keep away the quacks
It’s only eight pence halpenny a print and one six in tax.

He must have been an admiral, a sultan or a King
And to his praise we shall always sing
Look what he has done for us, he’s filled us up with cheer
Lord bless Charlie Mops the man who invented beer.

The Gypsy Rover

Chorus
Ah-dee-doo-ah-dee-doo-dah-day
Ah-dee-doo-ah-dee-day-dee
He whistled and he sang ’til the green woods rang
And he won the heart of a lady.

A gypsy rover came over the hill
into the valley so shady.
He whistled and he sang ’til the green woods rang
and he won the heart of a lady.

Chorus…

She left her father’s castle gate.
She left her own true lover.
She left her servants and her estate
to follow her gypsy rover.

Chorus…

Her father mounted his fastest stead
and searched the valley all over.
He sought his daughter at great speed
and the whistlin’ gypsy rover.

Chorus…

At last he came to a mansion fine
down by the river glady.
And there was music and there was wine
for the gypsy and his lady.

Chorus…

“He is no gypsy, my Father,” she cried
“but Lord of these lands all over.
And I shall stay ’til my dying day
with my whistlin’ gypsy rover.”

Johnny Be Fair

Oh Johnny be fair and Johnny be fine,
he wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Johnny but me father up and said.
“I’m sad to tell you daughter what your mother never knew.
That Johnny to is a son of mine and so he’s kin to you.”

Oh Billy be fair and Billy be fine,
he wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Billy but me father up and said.
“I’m sad to tell you daughter what your mother never knew.
That Billy to is a son of mine and so he’s kin to you.”

(Can go on and on with as many names as you would like in insert!)

Well you never seen a girl so sad and sorry as I was.
The boys in town are all my kin and my father is the cause.
If life should thus continue I shall die a single miss
so I go to my mother and complain to her of this.

Oh daughter didn’t I teach you to forgive and to forget.
Your father might have sowed his oats but still you needn’t fret.
Your father may be father to all the boys in town but still…
He’s not the one who sired you so marry who you will.

Johnny Jump Up

Come and listen, I’ll tell you what happened to me
One day as I went down to Cork by the sea
The day it was hot and the sun it was warm,
So says I a quiet pint wouldn’t do me no harm
I went in and I called for a bottle of stout
Says the barman, I’m sorry, all the beer is sold out
Try whiskey or paddy, ten years in the wood
Says I, I’ll try cider, I’ve heard it was good.

Chorus:
Oh never, Oh never, Oh never again
If I live to be a hundred or a hundred and ten
I fell to the ground and I couldn’t get up
After drinking a quart of the Johnny Jump Up

Ahhh…
After downing the third I went out to the yard
Where I bumped into Brody, the big civic guard
Come here to me boy, don’t you know I’m the law?
Well, I up with me fist and I shattered his jaw
He fell to the ground with his knees doubled up
But it wasn’t I hit him, ’twas the Johnny Jump Up

The next thing I remember down in Cork by the sea
Was a cripple on crutches and says he to me
I’m afraid of me life I’ll be hit by a car
Won’t you help me across to the Celtic Knot Bar?
After drinking a quart of that cider so sweet
He threw down his crutches and danced on his feet

Chorus…

I went down the lee road, a friend for to see
They call it the madhouse in Cork by the Sea
Well when I got there, sure the truth I will tell,
They had this poor bugger locked up in a cell
Said the guard, testing him, say these words if you can
Around the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran
Tell him I’m not crazy, tell him I’m not mad
It was only a sip of the bottle I had

Chorus…

A man died in the mines by the name of McNabb
They washed him and laid him outside on the slab
Well after the parlors measurements did take
His wife brought him home to a bloody fine wake
Twas about 12 o’clock and the beer was high
The corpse sits up and says with a sigh
I can’t get to heaven, they won’t let me up
Til I bring them a quart of the Johnny Jump Up

Chorus…

So if ever you go down to Cork by the sea
Stay out of the ale house and take it from me
If you want to stay sane don’t you dare take a sup
Of that devil drink cider called Johnny Jump Up

Chorus… (x2)

A Lusty Young Smith

A lusty young smith at his vice stood a-filing.
His hammer laid by but his forge still aglow.
When to him a buxom young damsel came smiling,
And asked if to work in her forge he would go.

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

“I will,” said the smith, and they went off together,
Along to the young damsel’s forge they did go.
They stripped to go to it, ’twas hot work and hot weather.
They kindled a fire and she soon made him blow.

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

Her husband, she said, no good work could afford her.
His strength and his tools were worn out long ago.
The smith said “Well mine are in very good order,
And now I am ready my skill for to show.”

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

Red hot grew his iron, as both did desire,
And he was too wise not to strike while ’twas so.
Said she, “What I get I get out of the fire,
So prithee, strike home and redouble the blow.”

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

Six times did his iron, by vigorous heating,
Grow soft in her forge in a minute or so,
But as often was hardened, still beating and beating,
But the more it was softened, it hardened more slow.

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

When the smith rose to go, said the dame full of sorrow:
“Oh, what would I give could my husband do so.
Young smith with your hammer come hither tomorrow,
But please could you use it once more ‘ere you go!”

With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle.
With a jingle bang jingle bang jingle high ho.

Maids When You’re Young

An old man came courting me
Hey do a dority
An old man came courting me
Me being young
An old man came courting me
All for to marry me
Maids when you’re young never wed an old man

Chorus
For he’s got no faloodorum, fadidledo doorum
For he’s got no faloodoorum, fadidleday
He’s got no faloorum, he’s lost his ding doorum
So maids when you’re young, never wed an old man

Now when we went to the church, hey do a dority
When we went to the church, me being young
When we went to the church, he left me in the lurch
Maids when you’re young, never wed an old man

Chorus…

Now when we went to our bed, hey do a dority
Now when we went to our bed, me being young
When we went to our bed, he neither done nor said
Maids when you’re young never wed an old man

Chorus…

Now when he went to sleep, hey do a dority
Now when we went to sleep, me being young
When we went to sleep, out of bed I did creep
Into the arms of a handsome young man

And I found his falodoorum, fa didle dodoorum
I found his faloodoorum, fa didle all day
I found his falodoorum and he got my dingdoorum
so maids when you’re young never wed an old man

The Moose Song

When I was a young lad I used to like girls,
I’d play with their corsets and fondle their curls.
‘Till one day, my lady I caught with some churl,
Now you’d never get treated that way by a moose.

Moose, moose, I likes a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
I’ve had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.

Now when I’m in need of a very good lay,
I go to my closet and get me some hay.
I go to my window and spread it around.
‘Cause moose always come when there’s hay on the ground.

Moose, moose, I likes a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
I’ve had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.

Gorillas are all right on Saturday night,
Lions and tigers, they puts up a fight.
But it’s just not the same when you slam your caboose,
As the feeling you get when you humps with a moose.

Moose, moose, I likes a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
I’ve had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.

I’ve done it with beasties with long flowing hair,
I’d do it with snakes if their fangs were not there.
I’ve done it with walrus, a monkey, and goose,
But it’s just not the same when you screw with a moose.

Moose, moose, I likes a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
I’ve had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.

Now that I am old and advanced in my years,
I look back on my life and shed me no tears.
As I sit in my chair with my glass of Matheus,
Playing Hide-The-Salami with Melba the Moose.

Moose, moose, I likes a moose,
I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.
I’ve had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I’ve never had anything quite like a moose.

Roll Your Leg Over (with the “Wench Version”)

If all of the girls were bells in a tower
And I was a clapper, I’d bang one each hour

Chorus:
Go roll your leg over, roll your leg over
Roll your leg over the man in the moon.

If all of the girls were fish in the ocean
And I was a wave (or whale) I would teach them the motion.

I wish all of the girls were fish in a pool
And I was a whale with a waterproof tool.

If all of the girls were little white rabbits
And I was a hare, I would teach them bad habits.

If all them young ladies was up for improvement.
I’d give them some help with a ball-bearing movement.

If all them young ladies was little white kittens
And I was the tom cat, I’d give them new fittin’s

If all them young ladies was B-29’s,
And I was a fighter, I’d buzz their behinds.

If all them young ladies was bats in a steeple
And I were a bat—there’d be more bats than people.

If all them young ladies was diamonds and rubies
And I were a jeweler, I’d shine up their boobies.

If all them young ladies was wheels on a car,
Then I’d be the piston and go twice as far.

If all them young ladies was rushes a-growing,
I’d take out my scythe and set out a-mowing.

If all them young ladies was bricks on a pile,
Then I’d be the mason and I’d lay them in style.

If all the young ladies were singing this song
It would be twice as dirty and three times as long.

And here is the wench-version:

If all the young laddies were little white flowers,
I’d be a bee a suck them for hours

If all the young laddies were keys to a gate,
I’d be the lock, insert and rotate

If all the young laddies were cows by a stream
I’d lay meself down and lick up the cream

If all the young laddies were fish in the ocean
I’d be the waves and show them the motion

If all the young laddies were waves in the sea
I’d be the shore and I’d let them lick me

If all the young laddies were ships on the sea,
I’d be the waves and I’d let them ride me

If all the young laddieswere pies on a shelf
I’d be the baker and eat them meself

If all the young laddies were boards on the floor
I’d lay meself down and make them creak more

If all the young laddies were hounds on a spree
I’d be the fox and I’d let them chase me

If all the young laddies were flames in a fire
I’d be the bellows and blem them all higher

If all the young laddies were sharks in the sea
I’d be a minnow and let them eat me

If all the young laddies were bricks in a pile,
I’d be the mason and lay them with style

If all the young laddies were steeds in a stable
I’d be the groom and mount all I’m able

If all the young laddies were grapes in the sun
Id’d brab a big bunch, squeeze their juice one by one

If all the young laddies were bakers of pie
I’d be the bread yeast and make them all rise

If all the young laddies were potter of clay
I’d sit on their wheels and rotate all day

If all the young laddies were grapes on the vine
I’d be the one to make them all wine

If all the young laddies were Toms on the prowl
I’d be the kitten that makes them all yowl

If all the young laddies became nice chew toys
I’d be the one who had trained all those boys.

If all the young laddies were barrles of whiskey rye
I’d turn on their spigots and drink they all dry

If all the young laddies were butchers so sweet
I’d hang on their hooks and I’d pound on their meat

If all the young laddies were clouds puffy and gray
I’d be the wind and I’d blow them all day

If all the young laddies were sailed in channels quite thin
I’d be the light-house and guide them all in

If all the young laddies were milk in a cup
I’d be a kitten and lick them all up

If all the young laddies were watches in shiny gold cases
I’d be the hands and I’d sit on their faces

If all the young laddies were singin’ this ditty
IT WOULD BE TWICE AS LONG, BUT JUST HALF AS WITTY

If all the young laddies were big as they say
Then nary a lass would be walkin’ this day!

The Scotsman

A Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked he’d drunk more than his share
He staggered on until he could no longer keep his feet
Then stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

Later on two young and lovely girls just happened by,
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
You see yon sleeping Scotsman who is young and handsome built
I wonder if it’s true what they don’t wear beneath their kilt.
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
I wonder if it’s true what they don’t wear beneath their kilt.

They crept up to the sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Then lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing but what Gold had graced him with upon his birth.
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
There was nothing there but what God gave upon his birth.

They marveled for a moment then one said we’d best be gone
But let’s leave a present for our friend before we move along
They took a blue silk ribbon and the tied it in a bow
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot’s lifted kilt did show.
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
Around the bonnie spar that the Soct’s lifted kilt did show.

The Scotsman woke to nature’s call and stumbled toward a tree
Behind a bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees
Then in a startled voice he says to what’s before his eyes
He said, “Lad I don’t know where you’ve been but I see you won
first prize”.
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
“Oh Lad I don’t know where you’ve been but I see you won first prize!”

Tell Me Ma

I’ll tell me ma when I go home
The boys won’t leave the girls alone,
They pull my hair and they stole my comb,
But that’s alright ’til I go home.

She is handsome, she is pretty,
She’s the belle of Belfast city,
She is courtin’ one, two, three,
Please won’t you tell me who is she.

Albert Mooney says he loves her,
All the boys are fighting for her,
They knock at the door and they ring at the bell,
Saying Oh my true love are you well.

Out she comes, ready to go,
Rings on her fingers, bells on her toes,
Old Jenny Murray says she’ll die
If she doesn’t get the fellow with the roving eye.

Let the wind and the rain and the hail blow high
And the snow come tumbling from the sky,
She’s as nice as apple pie,
She’ll get her own lad by and by.

When she gets a lad of her own
She won’t tell her ma when she goes home,
Let them all come as they will
For it’s Albert Mooney she loves still.

Whiskey in the Jar

As I was going over the Kilmagenny mountain
I met with captain Farrell and his money he was counting.
I first produced my pistol, and the produced my rapier.
Said stand and deliver, for I am a bold deceiver.

Chorus:
musha ring dumma do damma da
whack for the daddy ‘ol
whack for the daddy ‘ol
There’s whiskey in the jar .

I counted out his money, and it made a pretty penny.
I put it in my pocket and I brought it home to Jenny.
She said and she swore, that she never would deceive me,
but the devil take the women, for they never can be easy

I went into my chamber, for to take a slumber,
I dreamt of gold and jewels and for sure it was no wonder.
But Jenny took my charges and she filled them up with water,
and sent for captain Farrel to be ready for the slaughter.

It was early in the morning, before I rose to travel,
the guards were all around me and likewise captain Farrel.
I first produced my pistol, for she stole away my rapier,
but I couldn’t shoot the water so a prisoner I was taken.

If anyone can aid me, it’s my brother in the army,
if I can find his station in Cork or in Killarney.
And if he’ll come save me, we’ll go roving near Kilkenny,
and I swear he’ll treat me better than me own sportling Jenny

Now some men take delight in the drinking and the roving,
but others take delight in the gambling and the smoking.
But I take delight in the juice of the barley,
and courting pretty fair maids in the morning bright and early

Wild Mountain Thyme

Oh, the summertime is comin’,
And the trees are sweetly blooming,
Where the wild mountain thyme
Grows around the blooming heather

Chorus
Will ye go, lassie, will ye go?
And we’ll all go together to pick wild mountain thyme
All around the blooming heather.
Will ye go, lassie, will ye go?

I will build my love a bower
By yon pure crystal fountain
And around it I will place
All the flowers of the mountain.

Chorus…

If my true love e’er should leave me
I would surely find another
Where the wild mountain thyme
Grows around the blooming heather.

Chorus…

Oh, the autumn-time is comin’,
And the leaves are gently falling,
Where the wild mountain thyme
Grows around the blooming heather

Chorus…

Wild Rover

I’ve been a wild rover for many a year
And I spent all me money on whiskey and beer,
And now I’m returning with gold in great store
And I promise to play the wild rover no more.

Chorus:
And it’s no, nay, never, (clap clap clap clap!)
No nay never no more,
Will I play the wild rover
No never no more

I went to an ale-house I used to frequent
And I told the landlady me money’s all spent.
I asked her for credit, she answered me “nay
For sure a custom like yours I could get any day.”

Chorus

And from my pocket I took sovereigns bright
And the landlady’s eyes, they lit up with delight.
She said “I have whiskey and wines of the best
And the words that I spoke sure were only in jest.”

Chorus

I’ll go home to my parents, confess what I’ve done
And I’ll ask them to pardon their prodigal son.
And if they forgive me as of times before
Then I’ll promise to play the wild rover no more.

Chorus

Step It Out Mary

 

In the village of Kildorey, there lived a maiden fair
Her eyes they shone like diamonds, she had long and golden hair
And a countryman came riding, up to her father’s gate
Mounted on a milk white stallion, he came at the stroke of eight

Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Step it out Mary, if you can
Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Show your legs to the countryman

I’ve come to court your daughter, Mary of the golden hair
I have wealth and I have money, I have goods beyond compare
I will buy her silks and satin and a gold ring for her hand
I’ll build for her a mansion, she’ll have servants to command

Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Step it out Mary, if you can
Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Show your legs to the countryman

Oh kind sir I love a soldier, I’ve pledged to him my hand
I don’t want your wealth nor money, I don’t want your goods nor land
Mary’s father spoke up sharply: “You will do as you are told
You’ll be married on next Sunday and you’ll wear that ring of gold”

Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Step it out Mary, if you can
Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Show your legs to the countryman

In the village of Kildorey, there’s a deep stream running by
They found Mary there at midnight, she drowned with the soldier boy
In the cottage there is music, you can hear the father say:
“Step it out Mary my fine daughter, Sunday is your wedding day”

Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Step it out Mary, if you can
Step it out Mary, my fine daughter
Show your legs to the countryman

 

An Irish Lullaby

 

Over in Killarney
Many years ago,
Me Mither sang a song to me
In tones so sweet and low.
Just a simple little ditty,
In her good ould Irish way,
And l’d give the world if she could sing
That song to me this day.

Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, Too-ra-loo-ra-li,
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, hush now, don’t you cry!
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, Too-ra-loo-ra-li,
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, that’s an Irish lullaby.

Oft in dreams I wander
To that cot again,
I feel her arms a-huggin’ me
As when she held me then.
And I hear her voice a -hummin’
To me as in days of yore,
When she used to rock me fast asleep
Outside the cabin door.

 

Hey Ho

Hey ho, nobody home
Meat nor drink nor money have we none
Still we will be merry
Hey, hey ho

Ah, poor bird
Take thy flight
High above the sorrow
Of this sad night

Rose, rose rose red
Shall I ever see thee wed
I will marry at thy will sire
At thy will

 

Queen’s Round


Long may she reign in majesty glorious,
Ever victorious,
God save the Queen!

 

Rattling Bog

 

[Chorus:]
Oh ho the rattlin’ bog
The bog down in the valley-oh
Oh ho the rattlin’ bog
The bog down in the valley-oh

Now, in this bog,
There was a tree,
A rare tree,
A rattlin’ tree,
The tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

Now, on this tree,
There was a limb,
A rare limb,
A rattlin’ limb,
The limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

Now, on this limb,
There was a branch,
A rare branch,
A rattlin’ branch,
The branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

On this branch,
There was a twig,
A rare twig,
A rattlin’ twig,
The twig on the branch
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

On this twig,
There was a nest,
A rare nest,
A rattlin’ nest,
The nest on the twig,
And the twig on the branch,
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

In the nest,
There was an egg,
A rare egg,
A rattlin’ egg,
The egg in the nest,
And the nest on the twig,
And the twig on the branch,
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

On the egg,
There was a bird,
A rare bird,
A rattlin’ bird,
The bird on the egg,
And the egg in the nest,
And the nest on the twig,
And the twig on the branch,
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

On the bird,
There was feather,
A rare feather,
A rattlin’ feather,
The feather on the bird,
And the bird on the egg,
And the egg in the nest,
And the nest on the twig,
And the twig on the branch,
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

On the feather,
There was a flea,
A rare flea,
A rattlin’ flea
The flea on the feather,
And the feather on the bird,
And the bird on the egg,
And the egg in the nest,
And the nest on the twig,
And the twig on the branch,
And the branch on the limb,
And the limb on the tree,
And the tree in the bog,
And the bog down in the valley-oh!

[Chorus]

And the bog shall live in the valley-oh!

 

Health to the Company

 

Kind friends and companions, come join me in rhyme
Come lift up your voices in chorus with mine
Come lift up your voices, all grief to refrain
For we may or might never all meet here again


So here’s a health to the company and one to my lass
Let’s drink and be merry all out of one glass
Let’s drink and be merry, all grief to refrain
For we may or might never all meet here again


Here’s a health to the wee lass that I love so well

For style and for beauty there’s none can excel

There’s a smile on her countenance as she sits upon my knee

There is no man in this wide world as happy as me


So here’s a health to the company and one to my lass

Let’s drink and be merry all out of one glass

Let’s drink and be merry, all grief to refrain

For we may or might never all meet here again


Our ship lies at anchor, she is ready to dock

I wish her safe landing without any shock

And if ever I should meet you by land or by sea

I will always remember your kindness to me


So here’s a health to the company and one to my lass

Let’s drink and be merry all out of one glass

Let’s drink and be merry, all grief to refrain

For we may or might never all meet here again

 

Bedlam Boys

 

For to see mad Tom of Bedlam

Ten thousand years I’ll travel

Mad Maudlin goes on dirty toes

For to save her shoes from gravel

I repent that ever Poor Tom was so Disdain’d

My wits were lost when him I cross’t

Which makes me go thus chain’d

 

Chorus


And still I sing bonny boys

Bonny mad boys
Bedlam boys are bonnie

For they all go bare
And they live by the air

And they want no drink nor money

 

My staff has murder’d giants

My bag a long knife carries

For to cut mince pies from children’s thighs

 And feed them to the fairies

 

Chorus

 

My horn is made of thunder

I stole it out of heaven

The rainbow there is this I wear

For which I thence was driven

 

Chorus

 

I went down to Satan’s kitchen F

or to get me food one morning

There I got souls piping hot

All on the spit a-turning

 

Chorus

 

Then I took up a cauldron

Where boil’d ten thousand harlots
‘Twas full of flame, yet I drank the same
To the health of all such varlets

 

Chorus

 

The spirits white as lightning

Would on my travels guide me
The stars would shake and the moon would quake
Whenever they espied me

 

Chorus

 

And now that I have gotten

A lease than doomsday longer

To live on earth with some in mirth

Ten whales shall find my hunger

 

Chorus

 

No Gypsy, slut, or doxy

Shall win my mad Tom from me

We’ll weep all night and with stars fight

The fray will well become me

 

Chorus

 

And when that I have murdered

The man i’ the moon to a powder

His staff I’ll break his dog I’ll bake
And I’ll howl no demon louder

 

Chorus

 

So drink to Tom of Bedlam
Go Fill the seas in a barrel
I’ll drink it all, well brewed with gall
And maudlin drunk I’ll quarrel.
For to see mad Tom of Bedlam
Ten thousand miles I’ll travel
Mad Maudlin goes on dirty toes
For to save her shoes from gravel

 

Chorus

 

A Health Unto Her Majesty

 

Here’s a health unto her Majesty
With a fa la la la la la la
Confusion to her enemies
With a fa la la la la la la
And he who would not drink her health
We wish him neither wit nor wealth
Nor yet a rope to hang himself
With a fa la la la la la la la la laaaaaaa (Hold last note while another downs a drink)
With a fa la la la la la la

May she live in mirth and jollity
With a fa la la la la la la
And past-time with good company
With a fa la la la la la la
And he who would not join in glee

Must puritan or papist be
And him we curse with misery

With a fa la la la la la la la la laaaaaaa (Hold last note while another downs a drink)
With a fa la la la la la la

 

Let the Queen’s good health go round and round
With a fa la la la la la la
And let her praises loud resound
With a fa la la la la la la
And he who would not have it so
May he be cursed with a gouty toe
And days of wrath and nights of woe
With a fa la la la la la la la la laaaaaaa (Hold last note while another downs a drink)
With a fa la la la la la la

 

Our goodly Queen is fair of face
With a fa la la la la la la
Endowed with every female grace
With a fa la la la la la la
And every woman in this shire
Who doth not to the like aspire
May her breast be dun and her hair be wire

With a fa la la la la la la la la laaaaaaa (Hold last note while another downs a drink)
With a fa la la la la la la

So now we’ve raised our tankards high
With a fa la la la la la la
We’ve raised them full and lowered them dry
With a fa la la la la la la
Elizabeth, long may she reign
God save the Queen
May all here join in this refrain
And fill our tankards up again
With a fa la la la la la la la la laaaaaaa (Hold last note while another downs a drink)
With a fa la la la la la la

 

Bang Away Laddies

Chorus:
Bang away, laddies; bang away good and strong.
Oh, what’ll we do for a damn good screw when ________ dead and gone?
Baum baum baum

I wish I was a diamond upon my ________ hand,
And every time she wiped her ass, I’d see the promised land,
Oh, Lordy.

I wish I was the pee-pot, beneath my ________ bed,
For every time she took a piss, I’d see her maidenhead,
Oh Lordy.

My ________ had a baby. She named it Sunny Jim.
She dropped it in the pee-pot to see if he could swim^
Oh, Lordy.

First it went to the bottom, and then it came to the top,
Then my ________ got excited and grabbed it by the cock,
Oh, Lordy.

I wish I was a candle, within my ________ room,
And every night at nine o’clock, I’d penetrate her womb,
Oh, Lordy.

My ________ tall and sprightly. My ________ tall and thin.
I caught her by the railroad track jacking off with a coupling-pin,
Oh, Lordy.

I took her to the Poodle Dog, upon the seventh floor.
And there I gave her seventeen raps and still she called for more,
Oh, Lordy.

My ________ was arrested; ten dollars was the fine.
She said to the judge, “Take it out of this ass of mine,
Oh, Lordy.”

Sometimes I got a nickel and sometimes I got a dime,
But when I got a quarter, ________ lays it on the line,
Oh, Lordy.

Pappy loved my mammy; mammy loved the men.
Now mammy’s full of buckshot and pappy’s in the pen,
Oh, Lordy.

________ got religion; she had it once before.
She prayed to Christ with the minister while they did it on the floor,
Oh, Lordy.

My ________ went to Boston, and there she met a trucker,
She high-balled to the bedroom cryin’, “Double-clutch me,
Mother-fucker.”

My ________ had a sister who lived up on a hill.
If she hadn’t died of syphilis, we’d be banging still,
Oh, Lordy.

Some girls work in offices; some girls work in stores,
But ________ works in a hotel with forty other whores.
Oh, Lordy.

Lulu’s got a rooster.
Lulu’s got a duck.
She put them in the bathtub
To see if they would.

Lulu’s got two boy friends.
They are very rich.
One’s the son of a banker,
The other’s a son-of-a

Cows wear bridles.
Horses wear bits.
Lulu wears a sweater
To cover up her.

 

 

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